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Candorville

Comics and cartoons about waters and watering.

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Result page:    2  3  Next  (42 images)


1. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-10-27 water 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-10-27 Pub. Date: 2019-10-27
Image Number: 180026
Caption: $12 for bottled water?! Haven't you been watching the news? American's aging pipes are leaching chemicals into the water that cause horrific illnesses. The entire city of Flint was poisoned by led, leading to developmental damage in children and probably causing an outbreak of Legionnaires' Disease. All bottled water is tested for lead. But ours is special. It's guaranteed to be 100% free of certain other chemicals too. Out bottled water is also 100% free of adamantium, NTH metal, vibranium, kryptonite and dilithium. No other bottled water on the market makes that claim. Just give me coffee. Regular or guaranteed aniumanium-free? Very bad man.
     
2. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-09-30 water 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-09-30 Pub. Date: 2019-09-30
Image Number: 179725
Caption: Huff here's huff your huff tea huff … huff … huff … huff … I will almost certainly regret asking you this, but what on earth are you doing, you cretin? All huff across America, huff office worker are ditching huff their desks and walking huff on treadmills while they work. Can I get some water. Coming right up. Good thing I wore my tripping shoes.
     
3. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-05-26 water 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-05-26 Pub. Date: 2019-05-26
Image Number: 177771
Caption: One of my readers asked me Why do I sense such anger in you? What'd you say? I said That's probably because I'm not a sociopath. I said When people die because they can't afford health insurance, I care. When we tell kids they're nothing without college and then saddle them with loans they can never repay ... I care. When people figure out all sorts of ways to keep black people from voting, I care ... When poor people are being lied to about whether their water is safe to drink, I care. When our President separates toddlers and babies from their asylum-seeking mothers for months, I care. And because I care, I'm angered. I bet being a sociopath is relaxing. I'll relax when there's not more police brutality. Shut up, I'm trying to relax.
     
4. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-09-23 water 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-09-23 Pub. Date: 2018-09-23
Image Number: 173981
Caption: Hello, you've reached the Breakeezy warranty department. This is Ryan. How may I hinder you? Hi Ryan. I called last week to tell you the water dispenser on my Breakeezy refrigerator was stuck and pouring water all over my floor. I'd just bought a $400 extended warranty a month earlier. you sent out a repairman, and he fixed it. Then he sent me a bill for $200. He said you told him the repair wasn't covered by my policy! That's right. The fine print clearly states that we don't cover pre-existing problems. It broke a month after I bought the warranty! After!!! That's not pre-existing! The fine print's fine print clearly states that quantum theory suggests time may flow in both directions.
     
5. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-09-10 water 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-09-10 Pub. Date: 2018-09-10
Image Number: 173982
Caption: Did you know they've probably found the advanced, lost city of Atlantis, Susan? They found it decades ago in the Sahara Desert. They call it The Eye of Africa. It fits almost every description Plato wrote: Equidistant, concentric rings of land and what probably used to be water ... mountains to the north showing evidence of ancient rivers, etc. You'd think an army of archeologists would've gone there by now to explore ... but nope. Nothing. I still don't think it's true that They don't want to admit Africa ever created anything. Do you have any idea how many people insist aliens must've built the pyramids.
     
6. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-05-03 water 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-05-03 Pub. Date: 2018-05-03
Image Number: 171055
Caption: Did you know that Chicago's water is full of brain-damaging lead, jut like in Flint? It's probably been there for decades. Did you know studies have shown links between childhood lead exposure and violent crime? Did you know that plenty of other cities that have lots of violent crime also have ancient lead pipes bringing water into their homes? Did you know that nobody seems to be able to put two and two together? Prob'ly 'cause of all that lead.
     
7. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-03-14 water 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-03-14 Pub. Date: 2018-03-14
Image Number: 169395
Caption: The Huffington Post keeps deleting my comments every time I write anything even remotely negative about establishment Democrats. You one to talk. You keep deleting e're comment I pot on your own news site. That's totally different. I wrong an article about how water, inaction and institutional racism are still poisoning people in Flint, Michigan. Your response was totally out of line. No, it was high-level satire. His is lemme barrow $3 satire? I even posted a satirical link to my Paypal.
     
8. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-03-13 water 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-03-13 Pub. Date: 2018-03-13
Image Number: 169394
Caption: I’m started an ongoing series on my news site where I cover stories the country has forgotten about. Dr. Noodle. I'll be covering how people are still being poisoned in Flint, how the Sioux are still fighting to keep an oil company from threatening their water supply, etc ... The preface I'm writing reminds people we're still at war in Afghanistan after 17 years ... Yes, yes. But the fact remains, I can't diagnose the entire country with amnesia without losing my license. C'mon, it would add so much to the preface.
     
9. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-02-04 water 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-02-04 Pub. Date: 2018-02-04
Image Number: 167354
Caption: More than 170 million of us might have radium in our tap water, Clyde. Radium. Do you have any idea what this means? What it mean, Big L? Canada or Bust! It means we may be drinking radioactive water. It could cause all sorts of things: anemia, bone cancer, cataracts, fractured teeth, death ... invisibility, super speed, wings, teleportation, mind-reading, laser eyes, crime-fighting, and a spandex-and-cape fetish. I'm just trying to look on the bright side of living in a country where the White House keeps nominating a person who's known for falsifying data to get around water safety regulations to be head of the White House Council of Environmental Quality. I don't drink nothin' but Pepsi, bruh, so I don't care 'bout none of this. I'm gonna have to start working out if I have to wear spandex.
     
10. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-06-04 water 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-06-04 Pub. Date: 2017-06-04
Image Number: 158134
Caption: I've never been in here before. What's your best drink? That'd be the Gambler's Mocha. Sounds interesting. What's in it? Oh … a little of this, a little of that. For all you know, it's a smooth blend of hand-mixed Amedei Porcelana dark chocolate from Tuscany ... and Jamaican Blue Mountain coffee beans, hand-picked by sherpas 5,000 feet above sea level precisely at sunset ... topped with a light whip of frozen Arctic sea foam, and black diamond cream from Dubai ... for all you know ... Or it could be day-old sludge made with tap water from Flint? I thought you said you'd never been here before. Siri, where's the nearest Starbucks?
     
11. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-03-26 water 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-03-26 Pub. Date: 2017-03-26
Image Number: 155437
Caption: Yesterday, I visited my 97-year-old grandpa for the first time in six months. Dr. Noodle. He opened his door. I said "Grandpa! I missed you!" He looked me up and down and said "You gained a pound." It was all I could think about the whole time. As I drove him to his favorite restaurant, I was worried the seatbelt made me look bulgy ... When we ordered, I felt like he was judging my choices and so I only ordered crackers and water. When I hugged him goodbye, I sucked my gut in as hard as I could. Why don't we just focus on the fact he hugged you? When he hugged me, he said "You at that whole cracker."
     
12. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-01-30 water 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-01-30 Pub. Date: 2017-01-30
Image Number: 153971
Caption: This just in: President Trump has forbidden federal agencies from revealing information to the pub … Click … Toxic waste from an unknown source in neighboring Canardville may have leached into the Candorville reservoir, so do not … Click … May be an indication that the sun has exploded, but we won't detect it visually for another 8 minutes and 20 seconds. Click ... Gilligaaaan, the Skipper tooo ... the millionaire ... Mun mun mun -
     
13. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-11-21 water 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-11-21 Pub. Date: 2016-11-21
Image Number: 151294
Caption: 1982. If you could live anywhere in the whole wide world, where would it be? Other than here, I mean. Oh. Well … I think I would have to choose Canada. But only 'cause Atlantis is under water, and I can't swim. You could learn to swim. At my age? I should've learned when I was young. You are about to be seven. I feel like I wasted my youth.
     
14. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-11-05 water 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-11-05 Pub. Date: 2016-11-05
Image Number: 150476
Caption: 1982. What are you gonna be in 2012? I've narrowed it down to two options. If we don't blow ourselves up, I'll be a cyborg captain of a starship, hunting for black holes I can use to travel back in time and capture dinosaurs. If we DO blow ourselves up, I'll wear leather pants and roam the radioactive wasteland fighting mutants in order to bring a bucket of water and a little bit of peace to grateful orphans. It's good you have something to fall back on. Momma said that's important.
     
15. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-03-27 water 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-03-27 Pub. Date: 2016-03-27
Image Number: 140573
Caption: I got a cousin in Flint, Michigan, bruh. He say I could buy a house for $2. You wanna go in on this with me? Between us, we could buy like 500 houses. Yeah, there are lots of reasons for that, Clyde. For instance … haven't you been watching the news? A whole generation of children in Flint has been poisoned by lead in the water, and it may have caused a fatal disease outbreak. Yeh, but that only affect people that use water, bruh. I've been meaning to say, I think you drink WAY too much Pepsi. For a $2 house, I'll bathe in it, too.
     
16. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-02-24 water 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-02-24 Pub. Date: 2016-02-24
Image Number: 139562
Caption: What's it like havin' a kid, Big L? I'll put it this way, Clyde … You remember how when we were kids, a single drop of water on a little blade of grass would be amazing to you? No, I don’t remember that. Well … now I do. (This cartoon was originally published on 2014-02-05).
     
17. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2015-08-30 water 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2015-08-30 Pub. Date: 2015-08-30
Image Number: 131280
Caption: What's wrong, Lemont? I was just thinking about how the oceans make up two-thirds of our planet. And most of the underwater world is basically unexplored. We have no idea what or who may be living down there, Susan. What does it matter? We've been here for hundreds of thousands of years. If there's anyone down there, they obviously don't want to meet us. We don't know that. What if they're just as clueless as we are? What if they've just never thought to explore what's at the top of the water and don't even know life exists up here? There could be a whole civilization of mer-bears who think they're the paragon of animals. That's just silly, Lemont. Would a mer-bear be silly for wondering if there are air-fish at the top of the water?
     
18. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2014-02-05 water 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2014-02-05 Pub. Date: 2014-02-05
Image Number: 106774
Caption: What's it like havin' a kid, Big L? I'll put it this way, Clyde … You remember how when we were kids, a single drop of water on a little blade of grass would be amazing to you? No, I don’t remember that. Well … now I do.
     
19. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2013-06-01 water 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2013-06-01 Pub. Date: 2013-06-01
Image Number: 97404
Caption: Did they have running water when you were a kid? Hold on, kid … Thank God for Culture Clash. I know you're like five minutes old, but your youth doesn't make me old. I'm still young, too. When you're my age, you'll see what I mean. Did they have the internet when you were a kid? That's not important right now.
     
20. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2012-09-28 water 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2012-09-28 Pub. Date: 2012-09-28
Image Number: 87794
Caption: If you was at a friend house an' you stopped up his toilet … Thug 4 Life. Tap tap tap tap tap. … Would you tell him. Tap tap tap. … Or would you just throw his bed sheets an' old comic books down to soak up all the water? Hyperthetically speaking. How many legs do you have? The exterminator wants to know. Thug 4 Life. Tap tap.
     
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