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Rudy Park

Comics and cartoons about time, times, and timing.

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301. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-03-27 time 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-03-27 Pub. Date: 2015-03-27
Image Number: 124713
Caption: It's Dr. Sadie. Go ahead, caller. My son's expressing curiosity about … well … you know. I'm worried that maybe it's time to have the talk. How do I tell him about … you know … without making it seem like a good thing? I don't want him to go out and … you know. I just want him to know how the ... you know ... works with the ... you know ... without making him want to go out and ... you know. Maybe you should buy him a book and call it a day. I don't know ...
     
302. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-03-15 time 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-03-15 Pub. Date: 2015-03-15
Image Number: 123477
Caption: I can't wait till the Entourage movie comes out. Me an' my boys are going to see it opening day. You and your "boys"? What "boys"? You don't have any "boys." Of course I've got "boys." Every main character is surrounded by a group of friends. They may make fun of each other, they may get each other into trouble once a week. But they're always there for each other. I'm the main character in my life. Not really. "Main characters" make things happen; they don't just sit back and let things happen TO them. You're more of an extra in your life. Every time I post a selfie, I get at least 30 "likes." Would an extra get anywhere near 30 "likes"? I stand corrected. You're not an extra. You're just the cameraman.
     
303. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-03-07 time 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-03-07 Pub. Date: 2015-03-07
Image Number: 123749
Caption: You're on "Ask Sadie." What's your problem?! My family reunion is in Bermuda this year. But I hate flying. Ever since they started poking and prodding and x-raying and de-shoe-ung us, I swore I'd only go places to which I could drive. Are you using post-9/11 security enhancements as an excuse to avoid spending time with your annoying relatives? Because if so, I salute you. I will not be fondled by the TSA just to watch Aunt Bertha do the Electric Slide.
     
304. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-02-21 time 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-02-21 Pub. Date: 2015-02-21
Image Number: 123163
Caption: What's that? It's my second published book. It's called "The Official Biography of Rudy Park, the Loser Who Allegedly Works at my Local Café and Spends All His Free Time Doing Nothing on the Internet." It's just a bunch of empty pages. I know. Very meta, right?
     
305. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-02-14 time 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-02-14 Pub. Date: 2015-02-14
Image Number: 122757
Caption: I can't stand old "Star Trek." There's just way too much talking and not enough blowing stuff up. Well, your problem, little buddy, is you didn't give it enough time to grow on you. You're judging it superficially. Not true. I've seen every single episode of every series and all the movies in the last five hours. Fast-forwarding through things doesn't count as "watching" them. I think it was Shakespeare who said "a meadow that isn't just as lovely from the window of a bullet train isn't lovely at all."
     
306. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-02-09 time 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-02-09 Pub. Date: 2015-02-09
Image Number: 122752
Caption: I was watching the Super Bowl, having a good time, when all of a sudden there was this insurance company commercial. It has some kid saying he'll never do this or never do that, because he died in an avoidable childhood accident. Can you believe that? They had the nerve to momentarily kill my super-bowl-buzz in order to potentially save kids' lives. That was awful. What were they thinking? I don't know. Some people just don't have their priorities straight.
     
307. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-02-05 time 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-02-05 Pub. Date: 2015-02-05
Image Number: 122489
Caption: Boss … I need to take a few months off for paternity leave. That's commendable. I'm all for fathers taking an active role in their children's lives. It's good for the health of our economy. Take all the time you need, as long as the "baby" you're talking about isn't a kitten, a houseplant or some video game where you raise a simulation of a baby. I'd like to withdraw my request. I thought you might, minion.
     
308. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-02-02 time 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-02-02 Pub. Date: 2015-02-02
Image Number: 122486
Caption: You're all smiles today, little buddy. What's up? The Hololens. What's a "Hololens"? Goggles that project holograms and computer interfaces on top of everyday things. Next time I'm sitting on a crowded bus and someone's rump is right in front of me, I can turn it into a tv screen. Or play solitaire on it. I've been waiting for this tech my whole life. Can I project smiles onto the grouchy?
     
309. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-01-28 time 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-01-28 Pub. Date: 2015-01-28
Image Number: 122183
Caption: I'm finally done celebrating the State of the Union address. What are you talking about? House of Java.net CyberCafe. Every year after the speech, I drive cross-country and date ladies from every region, and of every race, creed and color. It's my way of spending time with like-minded patriots to celebrate how we're all more similar than we are different. Whether you're in California, the deep south or far-off Hawaii, you're never more than a 2-hour drive from miniature golf. Think about that.
     
310. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-01-25 time 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-01-25 Pub. Date: 2015-01-25
Image Number: 121151
Caption: What does the world need most this time of year, minion? Make no sudden movements. It needs to not feel guilty about all the broken New Year's resolutions. I'm not following you. I've created and artificial intelligence program that combs everything posted by or about you on social media ... and then decides your New Year's resolution for you. For instance, yours is to ask out Mbege Anyango from Cameroon. The A.I. was determined she's your soul mate. I've ... I mean the A.I. ... has taken the liberty of booking your flight and deducting all fares and fees from your checking. But I don't feel like going. The problem isn't making resolutions ... the problem is nobody keeps them. Your app doesn't solve that. It doesn't? Are you sure? What if I told you the A.I. also controls a used military drone I bought off eBay? Cameroon sounds lovely.
     
311. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-01-24 time 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-01-24 Pub. Date: 2015-01-24
Image Number: 121925
Caption: Armstrong, I've worked here for a long time and I think I deserve a raise. How about it? I'll give you an Indian Ocean raise, minion. How does an Indian Ocean raise of $2 an hour sound? Fun fact: The Indiana Ocean's on the opposite side of the world, so its "up" is our "down." I don't think that's how "up" works, boss. "Relativity" is just a theory.
     
312. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-01-22 time 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-01-22 Pub. Date: 2015-01-22
Image Number: 121923
Caption: Time moves so fast when you're older. No, it moves more slowly. No, it moves fast. You remember things that happened ten years ago as if they happened yesterday. No, it moves slowly. Every day is a tedious, endless moebius strip of boredom, punctuated only by the occasional argument. You win. This talk feels like it's going on forever. I feel like I've been winning for a million years.
     
313. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-01-17 time 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-01-17 Pub. Date: 2015-01-17
Image Number: 121464
Caption: You ever wonder what the world would be like if Lincoln had lived? Stop! I'm tired of everyone trying to blame my great-grandmother for what happened! I mean, sure, she could've let J.W. Booth down easy, instead of mocking and taunting him until the shame made him snap. But blaming her for what happened hours later is just unfair! The history books are so incomplete. She always got blamed for everything. Like the time she set off a firecracker at Fort Sumter. How was she to know?
     
314. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-01-13 time 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-01-13 Pub. Date: 2015-01-13
Image Number: 121460
Caption: Remember how I came in on December 31st and ordered a lardo-size fudgsicle sugarbomb mocha with butter sprinkles? Well, give me another one of those. Since it's something I originally had last year, it'll be like I had this one last year too. So it won't violate my New Year's resolution. The ancient art of Time-Shift-Fu. I'm a tenth level grand master. I studied under Moe Yin, the master who created "it's not really 'cheating' if it's with an ex."
     
315. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2014-12-24 time 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2014-12-24 Pub. Date: 2014-12-24
Image Number: 120665
Caption: You shoved a candy cane in my ear!! Ingrate. It's customary to thank someone when she gives you a Christmas gift. In my day, people would actually mail a handwritten letter to express their gratitude. But you young losers don't respect people enough to take time to do that. My ear!!! No, it's true.
     
316. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2014-12-18 time 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2014-12-18 Pub. Date: 2014-12-18
Image Number: 120327
Caption: It's Dr. Sadie. Go ahead, caller. I got a bonus for the first time in years. Would it be selfish to spend it on myself instead of on Christmas gifts? The age-old question: Do I enjoy the fruits of my labor or give them to the losers and ingrates who did absolutely nothing to earn them? Fly yourself to Maui and send them a photo of you eating a seven-course meal. That'll encourage them to work harder and earn their own bonuses. Encouragement is the best gift you can give. I really love your show, Dr. Sadie.
     
317. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2014-12-15 time 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2014-12-15 Pub. Date: 2014-12-15
Image Number: 120324
Caption: Boss, I just noticed on my paycheck that you've been withholding money to contribute to my 401kk. Isn't that supposed to be "401k"? Is "401kk" a typo? No, it's a retirement account. It's basically the same as a 401k. Only difference is, instead of your account being administered by an American, it's administered by a gentlemen in Kazakhstan, where I own a hideout ... I mean, a "time share." Ok, I was just checking.
     
318. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2014-12-14 time 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2014-12-14 Pub. Date: 2014-12-14
Image Number: 119418
Caption: Hello, Rudy. Hi Uncle Mort, what would you like today? How buttered scone; chamomile tea; big, heaping bow of oatmeal. Check, check and check. Also, an explanation of why you didn’t vote in the most important election of your life. Oh come on, Uncle Mort ... I've been voting for decades now. I vote every single time there's a presidential election. That's the one that really matters. All the other elections are for people who need the practice. Wait ... are you saying the presidential elections are the "big leagues" and the midterms are like the minors? DEMOCRACY IS NOT A SPORT!!! I'm no amateur.
     
319. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2014-12-12 time 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2014-12-12 Pub. Date: 2014-12-12
Image Number: 120014
Caption: Is this Randy the Love Doctor? Speaking. What ails you, brother? I'm dating this girl, and she's hinting that she wants a commitment. How do I keep getting what I want without giving her what she wants? That's easy. Every time she opens her mouth to talk about it, softly touch her lips with your finger and say ... "You know what separates us from everyone else?" "We don't even need words. Everything we have to say, we can say with our eyes." How long will that routine buy me? Six weeks of bliss.
     
320. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2014-12-10 time 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2014-12-10 Pub. Date: 2014-12-10
Image Number: 120012
Caption: Boss, give it to me straight: do I have room for growth here? Of course. If you apply yourself, and try hard every day to eat as much as you can … you can gain another 30 or 40 pounds in no time. Of course, then I'd have to drop your health insurance. You'd be a high risk for heart attack or diabetes. Let me rephrase: Do I have room for advancement? Of course. There's at least another 3 or 4 feet between you and my desk.
     
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