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Rudy Park

Comics and cartoons about relationships.

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81. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-03-15 relationship 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-03-15 Pub. Date: 2017-03-15
Image Number: 155666
Caption: I think Armstrong was coming on to me just now. 'Cause he was winking at you? The meaning of a wink depends entirely on context, little buddy. It could mean anything from "I want your body" to "I want you to dispose of this body." As someone who's dated several ladies of the mafia, trust me when I say it's sometimes tough to discern the difference. That's why I always recommend amateurs just ignore all winks. Ok.
     
82. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-02-26 relationship 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-02-26 Pub. Date: 2017-02-26
Image Number: 154365
Caption: Hi Darlene. Was that me you were waving at? Yes. Step half an inch closer, Rudy. This is a courtesy reminder of our upcoming midlife crisis appointment. Our what? I have you booked for "mad passionate fling with someone my friends and family would disapprove of," for March of this year through February of 2018. We start next month. That's enough time for you to firm your chest and arms up to a semi-acceptable level of near-manliness. It's also enough time for you to tattoo-up. I just emailed you an autocad blueprint with the designs and the specific locations on your body where they're to be scrawled ... and then she gave me a list of sweet nothings to whisper to her. My advice is to be very indignant about all this, beginning after February of 2018.
     
83. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-02-15 relationship 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-02-15 Pub. Date: 2017-02-15
Image Number: 154552
Caption: To be honest, dorkboy, I would be deeply saddened to see you lose your job to a robot. You would? Of course. You know why I come here every day to drink the swill you refer to as chamomile tea? It's because I'm a human being, and human beings needs the company of other human beings. And despite living a vapid life full of fakebook relationships, you, Rudy Park, are a human being ... or at a least a reasonable facsimile thereof. Plus, it's hard to make a robot weep like a baby. You almost never make me weep like a baby.
     
84. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-02-10 relationship 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-02-10 Pub. Date: 2017-02-10
Image Number: 154259
Caption: You're a hard man to read, Randy. At times, you seem like a cad. A Don Juan. A scoundrel. But at other times, you seem wise. Mature. Supportive. Ladies are most responsive to a "bad guy" to "good guy" ratio of 7 to 6.3756892. My findings have been published in the Oxford Journal of Lovin'.
     
85. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-02-05 relationship 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-02-05 Pub. Date: 2017-02-05
Image Number: 153213
Caption: I've decided it's time for me to start dating again. Again? I've known you for twelve years, and I've never seen you date. I've been focused on work to the exclusion of all else. I have no hobbies, no friends, no interests at all that are unrelated to by business. Lately that's started to take a toll on me, Rudy. I've become sullen. Depressed. Lonely. Bitter. Morose. My customers have begun to notice, and I worry my bad mood will drive them away. So ... you want to focus less on business because being all business is bad for business. Also, true love is eventually tax deductible.
     
86. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-01-07 relationship 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-01-07 Pub. Date: 2017-01-07
Image Number: 152866
Caption: It's not always a good idea for two contrarians like you to be together. Amanda Kern. Comics Counseling. You hear that, you old battle-axe? Yeah, I hear that, you old coot. That'll be $150.
     
87. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-01-06 relationship 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-01-06 Pub. Date: 2017-01-06
Image Number: 152865
Caption: Mort tells me he used to be a bold man. I was. Amanda Kern. Comics Counseling. He tells me he was an assertive man. Very. Well where is THAT Mort! I want that Mort! Be assertive! I command it!!! Assertive my left foot. I'm being assertive by refusing to be assertive.
     
88. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-01-05 relationship 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-01-05 Pub. Date: 2017-01-05
Image Number: 152864
Caption: Well first of all, he can't find anything, ever. I have to find the man's socks, his toothbrush … Amanda Kern. Comics Counseling. And he'll tell me he's hungry in the morning. Then he'll go in the other room, and in the evening he comes back in and tells me he's starving. It's like as soon as we got married, the man became so stupid he can't even remember how to slap some peanut butter on a cracker. No, I said tell me his good points. Those are his good points. Foul!
     
89. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-11-27 relationship 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-11-27 Pub. Date: 2016-11-27
Image Number: 150586
Caption: You've reached Randy the Love Doctor. What ails you? It's an emergency, Doctor Randy! I see a beautiful, sexy, confident, smiling lady at the end of the bar. Hold on, she … yeah she totally just looked at me. What do I do? Absolutely nothing. It took you 6.2 seconds to tell me she looked at you and to ask me what you should do about it. My exhaustive research has proven a man has only six seconds to respond affirmatively to a look of interest. After that, he'll either lose his nerve or whatever response he gives will seem rehearsed. Your best move now is Randy's Recovery #67: First, gaze off into the distance as if you're a tortured soul deep in self-reflection ... I can do that.
     
90. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-11-17 relationship 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-11-17 Pub. Date: 2016-11-17
Image Number: 151039
Caption: Boss, I've got a new idea. I think it'll quadruple our sales. Not again. I've come up with several action items that efficiently right-shore unique relationships and globally cloudify timely ideas. Speaking in business jargon doesn't disguise the fact that all your ideas are horrible. But this idea assertively exploits open-source leadership skills. You can assertively exploit that door over there.
     
91. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-09-25 relationship 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-09-25 Pub. Date: 2016-09-25
Image Number: 148040
Caption: So, what should we have for dinner tonight, Darlene? What? How about tofu burgers? You know how we love those. We? I could barbecue, we could invite the Johnsons and the Changs, and then maybe we could all cool off in the pool, throw some darts … Are you ok? Why are you talking like we're a couple? We've never even gone on a date and we never, ever will. You're right, maybe we shouldn't invite the Johnsons and the Changs. They're not getting along. Your "talk like you're already together" advice is bogus. Giving you advice is like giving a monkey my car keys.
     
92. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-09-18 relationship 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-09-18 Pub. Date: 2016-09-18
Image Number: 147784
Caption: Welcome to the Ask Sadie Radio Advice Hour. You're on Vancouver. It's my boyfriend. He's so distant. No emotionally … Emotionally it's like we're in the very same room, on the very same chair … in the same pair of pants, actually … we're close, is what I'm saying. But he lives so far away. Thousands of miles. And neither one of us can just pick up and move. We both have ties. Responsibilities. There's only one piece of advice I can give you ... Sock puppets. What you do is, you scrawl your lover's likeness onto the sock puppet. Then. whenever you feel heartache, slip it onto your fist ... and pummel yourself in the face for ever starting a stupid long-distance romance in the first place. Um ... thank you?
     
93. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-09-17 relationship 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-09-17 Pub. Date: 2016-09-17
Image Number: 148490
Caption: Randy the Love Doctor. What ails you, brother? My wife wants us to renew our vows and have a big ceremony. But I'd rather save that money for retirement. Should I tell her to go take a hike? Of course. That way, there's a good chance you won't have to worry about retirement at all. Exactly ... Wait, what do you mean by that?
     
94. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-09-10 relationship 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-09-10 Pub. Date: 2016-09-10
Image Number: 148231
Caption: @sexygirl4u and I had a falling out last night. I hit "like" on a revealing photo she'd posted. But then I worried that was too forward of me. So I hit "like" on all 89 of her less suggestive photos so she's wouldn't think I was a pervert. Then she blocked me. I just don't understand women, I guess. I'm starting to.
     
95. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-09-09 relationship 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-09-09 Pub. Date: 2016-09-09
Image Number: 148230
Caption: I met a girl last night. It went well. Do tell. We saw each other through a crowd. I winked at her. She winked back. If all goes well, we may get to second base tonight. Second base? We may exchange smiley emoticons instead of just hitting "wink." Are you sure you're ready for that?
     
96. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-09-04 relationship 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-09-04 Pub. Date: 2016-09-04
Image Number: 147195
Caption: Today's man lesson is "The Art of Promising." I'm ready. Part one: Never … promise … anything. Wait … What do you mean? Pretend you're the lady, ask me to promise you something. Ok … (ahem) … Promise me you won't ever even look at another woman? A man would have to be crazy to look at another woman when he could be looking at the most beautiful woman in the world. And I'm not crazy. Notice, if you will, not only is there a complete absence of a promise ... there are also at least four iron-clad loopholes built in. Can you identify them? This is worse than math to me.
     
97. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-09-02 relationship 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-09-02 Pub. Date: 2016-09-02
Image Number: 147935
Caption: Armstrong, do you remember the first girl you ever kissed? Of course I do, minion. Here, let me call it up … Ah, yes. Little Alice Chang, of 847 Wickerwood Lane. I have her preosculation agreement right here, dated 1-3-1979. Her what? It's like a prenup. It specifies that a kiss does not constitute an official "relationship." My lawyer went to town on her when she later demanded half my Twinkies. Very bad man.
     
98. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-08-27 relationship 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-08-27 Pub. Date: 2016-08-27
Image Number: 147679
Caption: Mort, I'm writing a case study about two diametrically opposed archetypes of your generation. Archetype number one: A bold, debonaire male … the type that suffered no fools, lived life to the fullest, and pursued romance with tough, smart "dames" who kept him on his toes. And then there's archetype number two: Weak, insecure, afraid of life, and dominated by overbearing romantic partners who brought him to his knees. Ok. I'll participate. Who'd you find for archetype #2? You might want to ask Sadie if she'll let you participate, first.
     
99. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-07-28 relationship 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-07-28 Pub. Date: 2016-07-28
Image Number: 146485
Caption: This is the Ask Sadie Show. You're on, caller. What's your problem? Movie critics. For the last time, my review of Star Trek was totally unbiased and professional. You said "Nerd Trek 3 is a steaming pile of mediocrity, which should appeal to the younger generations. This reminds me of the time I dated Bill Shatner." See? Completely objective. You said "Chris Pine isn't half the back-rubber Shatner is." Objectively speaking.
     
100. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-06-28 relationship 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-06-28 Pub. Date: 2016-06-28
Image Number: 145235
Caption: I'm going to be rich, famous, and irresistible to the opposite sex any day now, Randy. I think you've had one too many hot cocoas, little buddy. No, really. I've written a note for my descendants and buried it in a time capsule in my backyard. Once they read it, they'll time-travel back to the 20th century and genetically engineer my embryonic self. HOJ. They'll bestow me with superhuman charisma, epic good looks, and money-management skills. You're forgetting that to have descendants, you have to be able to get a date.
     
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