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Candorville

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1. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2020-01-23 politics 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2020-01-23 Pub. Date: 2020-01-23
Image Number: 181367
Caption: Bottom line, Brown: We want you back. How would Deputy Editor of the Opinion Sports Politics Business Calendar Section sound? Say what? The Candorville Chronicle. It's nothing … we've laid off a few people consolidated a few sections … Here's the exciting part: We would pay you very generously in stock options from my nephew's lemonade stand startup.
     
2. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2020-01-20 politics 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2020-01-20 Pub. Date: 2020-01-20
Image Number: 181364
Caption: In 2003, the White House had spent an entire year cherry-picking intelligence and lying to get their war. After 17 years of continuous war, all it takes to start a war is a president saying believe me. Yeh, but the President changed his mind about It, right? So it's all good. The bar being lowered this much is not all good. you still talking?
     
3. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2020-01-15 politics 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2020-01-15 Pub. Date: 2020-01-15
Image Number: 181260
Caption: I don't know what to do, Clyde. I just got an invitation to go give a speech at a journalism conference in Iran … Right after I published a series of opinion pieces condemning pretty much every side that brought us to the brink of war over there. On the one hand, it's dangerous for journalists these days, and I've never heard of the group that invited me. It's called Truth, Responsibility and Principle. T.R.A.P.? On the other hand, they say there's a free continental breakfast.
     
4. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2020-01-14 politics 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2020-01-14 Pub. Date: 2020-01-14
Image Number: 181259
Caption: … and then halfway into your article, you turned into a terrorist-lover. What? You wrote Just a little while ago, when the general we just assassinated was leading the fight to crush ISIS, we were all praising him. You wrote When we get on our high horse about freedom and liberty, much of the world wants to gag because they notice how we love butchers until we no longer need them. How's that make me a terrorist-lover? When we get introspective, the terrorists win.
     
5. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2020-01-13 politics 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2020-01-13 Pub. Date: 2020-01-13
Image Number: 181258
Caption: That article you wrote about how we got to the brink of war with Iran was fake news! How so? You wrote it all started in 1953 when out CIA overthrew Iran's democratically elected leader and installed a dictator. That's preposterous! How so? Everyone knows history didn't even start in Iran until 1979.
     
6. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2020-01-12 politics 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2020-01-12 Pub. Date: 2020-01-12
Image Number: 181111
Caption: I've lost all respect for the Dumbocrats. How could they impeach a president for investigating corruption?! That's not what they impeached him for. They impeached Mr. Trump for trying to get a foreign country to investigate the guy who just happened to be Mr. Trump's rival in the next election. Nonsense. Donald Trump is an intrepid investigator of corruption! That's why he was so concerned! He's concerned about corruption? At the age of three, he started helping his dad hide income. He went on to cheat charities, defraud students, use laundered money in his casino ... and that's just for starters. Intrepid investigators often go deep under cover. And aren't a lot of his friends corrupt oligarch types? The ones who aren't in jail or dictators, I mean.
     
7. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2020-01-07 politics 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2020-01-07 Pub. Date: 2020-01-07
Image Number: 181113
Caption: Governor Newsom sure came down on you for that article you wrote about Mayor Pete's fancy wine cave fundraisers. Yeah. He said There are literally hundreds of Democrats that have been in that same cave … which was a good point. So I wrote a new article called When everyone is corrupt, then no one is corrupt. Hate the game, not the player, Lemont. Aphorisms are just 2% less lazy than memes, Susan. I hit dog will holler. Stop that.
     
8. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2020-01-06 politics 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2020-01-06 Pub. Date: 2020-01-06
Image Number: 181112
Caption: I read your article where you called Mayor Pete's high-dollar wine cave fundraisers corrupt. That's so unfair, Lemont. For the sake of argument … hypothetically speaking, of course … Let's say someone showered Pete with cash in the wine cave in the hope that he'd throw his campaign's business to her P.R. firm ... but she didn't explicitly say that, she only stuck her business card between the $1,000 bills ... Go on ...
     
9. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-12-31 politics 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-12-31 Pub. Date: 2019-12-31
Image Number: 181016
Caption: You know how else we've come full circle since the 1920s? … White supremacists. In the 19-teens, we elected Woodrow Wilson, the most racist president of the 20th century. Between that, and all the black WWII veterans, black writers, black musicians, and the black middle class that was starting to boom ... white supremacists said it was time to make America hate again. Maybe they just needed to be understood.
     
10. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-12-23 politics 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-12-23 Pub. Date: 2019-12-23
Image Number: 180954
Caption: I impeach thee. What do you mean? There is an infinite number of alternate universes, Rosencrantz. And in an infinite number of universes, an infinite number of scenarios will play out. In universe 54892-B, we are the last beings on earth. I am Congress, and you are President. That is insane. Oh. Quite right. I meant you were president.
     
11. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-12-15 politics 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-12-15 Pub. Date: 2019-12-15
Image Number: 180764
Caption: I've decided to become a whistleblower. It's the latest thing. I'll report on how the boss called his coffee bean supplier in Ukraine and tried to extort them into announcing that out main competitor, Coffee King, is corrupt. He wanted them to lie and say Coffee King bought radioactive coffee beans from Chernobyl. My whistleblower report will be all over the news. It'll prompt an investigation. Naturally. At which point, the boss's cronies on the city council will deflect attention by demanding to know my identity. I'll finally be famous! So? Nobody would even know your name. That's perfect. We famous people value our privacy.
     
12. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-12-07 politics 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-12-07 Pub. Date: 2019-12-07
Image Number: 180646
Caption: Mun- mun- munch mu … Will weed political posts our of your Facebook feed, for good. DQ.
     
13. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-12-01 politics 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-12-01 Pub. Date: 2019-12-01
Image Number: 180584
Caption: I saw that article you wrote about how California should do a public takeover of that PG&E utility company … just because they seem to keep starting massive wildfires. And to stop that they keep turning off power for millions of people. Yeah. The state's publicly-owned utilities like SMUD and Silicon Valley Power don't seem to get themselves into these predicaments. Maybe that's because they don't spend their money on lobbyists, fancy dinners, huge salaries, or dividend payments. Yeah, but Venezuela. Um ... What? That's the universally recognized trump card for any conversation. So declared by the International Association of Weaselly Arguments. I don't recognize their authority. Venezuela.
     
14. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-11-24 politics 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-11-24 Pub. Date: 2019-11-24
Image Number: 180470
Caption: This just in: President Trump outraged the world today when he … hold on … We interrupt this story with breaking news … The President pulls troops out of Syria, abandoning the Kurds who fought on our beha -- We interrupt this story with breaking news … The President withheld military aid from Ukraine until they would agree to investigate the President's political rival, Jo -- Hold on ... We interrupt this story with breaking news ... the President seemed to advocate ethnic cleansing today, when he said -- hold one ... We interrupt this story with breaking news ... the colors ... pretty colors are talking to me. Can you hear? This just in: Trying to keep up with every one of the president's scandals may drive a @#$ crazy ... What?! This just in: (huff huff) producers and security are chasing a news anchor through the (huff huff) hallway. Click.
     
15. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-11-21 politics 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-11-21 Pub. Date: 2019-11-21
Image Number: 180467
Caption: The next election may be the last election. Russia hacked election systems in all fifty states last time. All signs point to that being just a trial run. And since one of our parties has spent the last couple decades suppressing votes, half the country has been trained not to care whether elections are fair. I think all votes should count, when they're cast by the right people. I heard that.
     
16. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-11-20 politics 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-11-20 Pub. Date: 2019-11-20
Image Number: 180466
Caption: I think everything went wrong when people decided not to care about the Iran-Contra thing. That's when we decided presidents could do whatever they want and get away with it. Our Democracy has been circling the drain of authoritarianism for the last 32 years. What we're witnessing now is just the big flush. It's a new metaphor I'm trying out. You should keep working on that.
     
17. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-11-19 politics 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-11-19 Pub. Date: 2019-11-19
Image Number: 180465
Caption: President been caught usin' money from his charity to buy a six-foot painting of hisself. 45 been caught defrauding students at his fake university. He been caught extorting Ukraine into interfering in the next election. An' his entire political party keep enablin' it all by makin' excuse after excuse for him ... an' smearing erebody who investigates him. Whatever, Clyde. I'm a serious journalist, I'm not going to write a hit piece about the cop who caught you jaywalking.
     
18. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-11-18 politics 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-11-18 Pub. Date: 2019-11-18
Image Number: 180435
Caption: Mainstream Media. Can't I just say one more thing about the latest billionaire who's running for presid … I said no!
     
19. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-11-10 politics 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-11-10 Pub. Date: 2019-11-10
Image Number: 180284
Caption: My Uncle Elroy passed away. I have so many regrets. We were never all that close. But he was always there, for all my graduations, for all the family dinners, and to take me to ballgames. But the last three years, our relationship was … not good. We argued all the time about Donald Trump. Oh my. He fell for ever conspiracy theory. He'd send me link after link to dailynutjob.com, and I'd respond with links of my own to actual news, to scientific journals, etc. The last time we messaged each other, he accused me of being part of the Deep State, and I accused him of being gullible. I see. You regret that you wasted his last years on earth arguing about Donald Trump. I regret that Uncle Elroy's not here to see Donald Trump finally get impeached.
     
20. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-11-02 politics 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-11-02 Pub. Date: 2019-11-02
Image Number: 180107
Caption: If I promise to get you a new book tomorrow, will you go to sleep? Awe you exthtowting me? Am I Ukwaine? What do you mean Am I Ukraine? Where did you hear language like extorting? Are you listening at my door while I'm watching the news, again? You know you're not supposed to do that. If you'we impeached, do I become the new daddy? Go ... to ... sleep.
     
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