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Rudy Park

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1. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2019-05-02 made 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2019-05-02 Pub. Date: 2019-05-02
Image Number: 177414
Caption: You can't go around saying I look like Cory Booker just because we both have dark skin. You should ask your parents about it 'cause I don't have a lot of time to waste with little kids. But I'll sum up my feelings in a nutshell. You've made a serious accusation. I don't like to be accused of looking like a liberal spender! Mommy!
     
2. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2019-04-20 made 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2019-04-20 Pub. Date: 2019-04-20
Image Number: 177237
Caption: Rudy, have a seat. There's something I need to tell you. Oh no. Businessman of the Year. Armstrong Maynard. I've made a decision. I've decided not to fire you. I love that such a personnel decision is considered news around here. Relieved and disgusted.
     
3. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2019-04-17 made 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2019-04-17 Pub. Date: 2019-04-17
Image Number: 177234
Caption: I said: Get me a @#$% coffee! You're healed. What saved you? I was watching the news and I saw you - on my tv - spending the night to buy a new iPhone as soon as they went on sale. Your mindless consumerism made me so @#$% angry, that I spontaneously healed so I could come back here and strangle you! Hand over that &@#$ iPhone, loser! No way, it's keeping you healthy.
     
4. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2019-03-21 made 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2019-03-21 Pub. Date: 2019-03-21
Image Number: 176890
Caption: Tonight on Newsmakers: Sadie Cohen, the matron whose anti-technology rants have made her a Youtube star. Mrs. Cohen, is it a contradiction that you're a YouTube star for hating technology? Hardly. I'm the voice of the people. They use technology, but they secretly resent it. They hate having to upgrade. They despise their addiction. Um ... but TV is ok, right? I'm coming for you next, #@%$ loser!
     
5. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-12-21 made 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-12-21 Pub. Date: 2018-12-21
Image Number: 175496
Caption: Welcome to pet obedience school. We're going to have fun and get these darlings into shape. Obey-Wan-Ken … Before we start, any questions? Obey! When I foment revolution among the pets, do you want to be tarred and feathered or just given a wedgie? The genetic enhancement of pets has made my job much harder. I think wedgie.
     
6. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-11-15 made 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-11-15 Pub. Date: 2018-11-15
Image Number: 174944
Caption: I think that Sadie might be my long lost sister. I have a sister who lives in Boca Raton, FL., who is the mirror image of Sadie. Do you think that God could have made two of them and one got separated at birth? - Caroline R. Actual reader letter. Don't be absurd. Even a divine entity could not have created two women as comely as I am, and ... And? I might have a twin sister! According to a random letter that sounds facetious. To be continued.
     
7. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-10-27 made 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-10-27 Pub. Date: 2018-10-27
Image Number: 174638
Caption: It's brilliant. Customers can have the opportunity to learn the secrets of making espresso drinks. We'll charge them double if they want to make their own, and, get this … I'd rather not … triple if they want the privilege of cleaning up their own cups in the sink! I'm back! You're back.
     
8. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-08-11 made 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-08-11 Pub. Date: 2018-08-11
Image Number: 173399
Caption: Thirty-two. Pardon? The number of babes I've necked with this summer. Thirty-two. Twenty-nine if you count sisters only once 'cause they're in the same family. You hate me. I hate you!!!
     
9. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-07-22 made 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-07-22 Pub. Date: 2018-07-22
Image Number: 172979
Caption: The Adventures of … Damsel-Saving. Recession Man! Wake up, there's a distress call. Oh brother … Hey, Recession man! There's a damsel in distress. It's not you. It's me. What? I'm working through some things. I'm feeling confined … I need space … my parents got divorced ... I never made any promises. Someone needs help, not a long-term commitment. I need alone time. Try Batman.
     
10. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-07-15 made 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-07-15 Pub. Date: 2018-07-15
Image Number: 172922
Caption: Rudy Park Enterprises is proud to announce its own Sadie Cohen has been selected as most obnoxious and caustic radio host of the year. Speech, speech!!! You're too kind. Obviously, every girl dreams of getting this kind of recognition. I'm well aware it's customary to thank everyone who made this moment possible. It's true. I might not have won if it weren't for the lifeless jerks imbeciles who listen to the show and write in with their stupid email questions. But you are all beneath contempt. The only person I want to thank is Rudy Park. Your shallow and insipid existence inspired m every single day. Can I tweet that?
     
11. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-02-25 made 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-02-25 Pub. Date: 2018-02-25
Image Number: 168289
Caption: I'm not entirely sure I'm conscious, doc. It occurred to me last night, I am not an individual. I am a colony of 32 trillion individual living cells. Dr. Noodle … each of which lives, breathes, performs tasks, and quite possibly considers itself to be a conscious individual with free will. The thought reminded me of when I was in the army. Each of us was an individual cell focused on an individual task ... but before we knew it, because of the decisions made unbeknownst to any of us grunts ... the body of us, the colony we all comprised ... had marched across Europe, and swum across the Pacific, and liberated half the world ... maybe I prescribed you a little too much Cannabis. You may think you thought that thought, but you're just an antibody reflexively protecting the colony.
     
12. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-02-19 made 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-02-19 Pub. Date: 2018-02-19
Image Number: 168666
Caption: I saw your band's latest video on Youtube, little buddy. What'd you think? It looked a lot like the climactic scene from "Purple Rain," only with your head instead of Prince's. Deepfakes are a legitimate form of artistic expression. If you want to complain, complain to the A.I. that made it. When the lawyers show up, I'm pretty sure the A.I.'s going to rat you out.
     
13. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-02-12 made 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-02-12 Pub. Date: 2018-02-12
Image Number: 168441
Caption: Youtube just made it impossible for me to earn a living from my channel! How so? It used to be you needed 10,000 views of your videos, and then they'd start running ads on your channel. Now you need 4,000 hours of watch-time and 1,000 subscribers! It took me a year to get 10,000 views, and then the bottom drops out! I'm missing out on $400/year now, according to Social Blade. Have you ever heard something that you just know would've made zero sense if you'd heard it ten years ago? First Facebook changed the algorithms, now this!
     
14. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-01-24 made 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-01-24 Pub. Date: 2018-01-24
Image Number: 167658
Caption: My people came from a paradise. We were all rich, well-educated homeowners who spoke English. Really? Of course not! It was a censored hole! We were all little censored who escaped, came here, and made this place censored too! Funny thing about censored when you spread it around and give it time, it sprouts roses. I thought you weren't supposed to use censored on flowers 'cause of parasites. All metaphors break down at some point. But you get the idea.
     
15. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-01-20 made 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-01-20 Pub. Date: 2018-01-20
Image Number: 167382
Caption: Sadie, I keep hearing all this talk about how the president might be literally insane. It's making me feel anxious. Sometimes I wonder if this is how the British felt when King George III went crazy and lost America. Or is it more like how the Romans felt when Caligula made his horse a senator? That reminds me: Did you get to ride Caligula's horse, or were you too old for that? Before I answer that, let me show you what the Romans did to losers in the old days ...
     
16. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-01-04 made 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-01-04 Pub. Date: 2018-01-04
Image Number: 166788
Caption: Akron, oh, you're on Ask Sadie. What's your problem?! I'm thinking of not signing up for health insurance this year. Good idea. In my day, there was no such thing as health insurance. If you got sick, you paid for it with either money or chickens. That's if you were a lily-livered coward who just had to see a doctor. When great-great-grandmother Cohen had her sixth heart attack, she just applied a poultice made of chestnut leaves and flour and kept on plowing.
     
17. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-12-18 made 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-12-18 Pub. Date: 2017-12-18
Image Number: 166295
Caption: I've lost faith in everything, Randy. I feel like a tiny raft drifting in a stormy sea. There is no up. There is no down. There entire foundation of the world is made of flimsy tissue paper. Maybe the Buddhists are right. Maybe nothing is really real at all. Internet going down for a few hours last week isn't that big a deal, little buddy. Yes, it really is.
     
18. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-11-22 made 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-11-22 Pub. Date: 2017-11-22
Image Number: 165178
Caption: Disney's trying to buy Fox. If they did that, then all of Marvel's best heroes would be in the MCU. It would be horrible! The whole Marvel cinematic universe is one big story told by dozens of movies. This would, like, triple the amount of movies I'd have to watch! I'd have to watch every X-Men spinoff to make sure I got every reference made in any Thor or Avengers movie, for instance. HOJ. Your definition of "have to" and my definition of "have to" are very different. I'd have to see them all in 3-D. I'd have to get a second job to afford that.
     
19. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-11-11 made 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-11-11 Pub. Date: 2017-11-11
Image Number: 164678
Caption: How many people in history do you think have died fighting over lines someone else drew on a map? Occupiers have often forced people who are polar opposites to live in one artificial "country." Iraq … Ethiopia … Yugoslavia … the United States … but then if we only lived in countries made up of people who agree with us, earth would have 7 billion countries. I disagree.
     
20. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-11-07 made 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-11-07 Pub. Date: 2017-11-07
Image Number: 164674
Caption: Hey boss, in light of all that's been happening in Hollywood and journalism, I just want to thank you. For what? Well, for a long time now, you've underpaid me, overworked me, threatened to replace me with undocumented workers or robots, made me an unwitting accomplice to money laundering for foreign oligarchs ... but you've never sexually harassed me. So for that, boss, I thank you. Only a fool would engage in an unprofitable ... I mean ... immoral ... activity. You're such a wonderful very bad man.
     
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