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Rudy Park

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121. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-03-27 internet 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-03-27 Pub. Date: 2016-03-27
Image Number: 140308
Caption: To tweet, or not to tweet - that is the question. Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer the snark and the venomous replies of anonymous jerks … or to take arms against the sea of haters, and by Googling links that prove them wrong, end them. To stop updating, to pause - to pause - perchance to browse the tweets of others ... Ay, there's the rub, for in that browsing state what dreams may come when we have re'lized others are wittier than we. But that the dread of something after tweeting, the undiscovered country, from whose bourn no burned-out Twitter-pundit returns, puzzles the will, and does make anonymous haters of us all. Thus 'tis better to never stop tweeting, and never to read the tweets of others.
     
122. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-03-23 internet 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-03-23 Pub. Date: 2016-03-23
Image Number: 140828
Caption: What were you doing during the Iraq war, Randy? What are you talking about? We knew each other back then. That was like 10 or 13 years ago. You can't expect me to remember every little detail about something that happened so long ago. I regularly delete old memory files to make room for all the new data constantly coming my way via Facebook, tweets, Instagram, etc. I wish I didn't have to do that. I wish I could just expand my storage by sticking a flash drive in my nose. Why don't you try? Maybe it'll work.
     
123. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-03-15 internet 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-03-15 Pub. Date: 2016-03-15
Image Number: 140522
Caption: I just edited your Wikipedia entry. I still have no idea what that means. Tap tap tap tap tap. It means you're now the longtime mistress of Donald Trump. At least, you were … until he discovered your pattern of credit card fraud, your obsession with taxidermies squirrels, and your cloven hooves. In my day, when a man spoke gibberish while staring at a little box, he was institutionalized. Tweeting a link aaand ... it's already gone viral.
     
124. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-03-03 internet 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-03-03 Pub. Date: 2016-03-03
Image Number: 139845
Caption: Guess what else I found on Youtube, Randy? Evidence Vladimir Putin is an immortal. There are two photos of soldiers who look exactly like Putin, taken in 1941 and way back in 1920. Exactly like him. Could be they're related. The notion of "genetics" is a huge conspiracy by the immortals. I found that out on Youtube.
     
125. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-03-02 internet 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-03-02 Pub. Date: 2016-03-02
Image Number: 139844
Caption: When you think about it, you have to be a complete idiot NOT to believe aliens crashed at Roswell in 1947. It's clear we reverse-engineered their tech. Before 1947: Primitive cars, planes and radio. After 1947: Spaceships, quantum computing, internet. Let me try ... Before 1947: No bikinis. After 1947: Bikinis. No, wait ... the bikini was 1946. That throws this whole theory into question. We really should have our own science show.
     
126. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-02-06 internet 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-02-06 Pub. Date: 2016-02-06
Image Number: 138615
Caption: Do you believe the world is all an illusion? I know it is. I know it can be bent by our collective will. When I was born, there were horses and buggies in the streets. But as soon as we all believed we could do it, we went to the moon. Oh, I agree. That's why I'm trying to get the whole internet to retweet "It's possible to upload our minds into immortal robot bodies." If the entire hive mind of earth tweets that at the same time, it's got to come true. I hope not. I'd hate for you to end up being the most important person in history.
     
127. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-02-05 internet 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-02-05 Pub. Date: 2016-02-05
Image Number: 138614
Caption: No offense, but I'm eternally grateful to know that you stand no chance of ever passing on your genes. That's where you're wrong. I pass on my jeans at least once a year. What do you think Craigslist was invented for? Craigslist? Yeah. Whenever I get bored, I go on there and pass on my jeans. Sometimes I don't even charge anything. Tell me you're not saying what I think you're saying. I'm saying that site is full of people who'd like to get into my pants.
     
128. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-01-31 internet 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-01-31 Pub. Date: 2016-01-31
Image Number: 137772
Caption: I wonder what life was like before the internet. What are you talking about? You don't have to wonder what life was like before the internet. You were here! We have no proof of that. I've googled myself. There's no reference to me existing prior to 1994. No blog posts, no photos, not tweets. I mean sure, you can find my birth certificate, but that means nothing. There is nothing online that was written by me, personally, prior to 1994. Stop that!!! I found a box of old polaroids, they're supposedly pictures of me as a child. But there's no proof of that. There are no photos of me that have verifiable metadata or time stamps prior to 1994. Don't look at me like that. There isn't a single link proving you existed prior to 1997 ... so respect your elders. STOP THAT!!!
     
129. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-01-18 internet 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-01-18 Pub. Date: 2016-01-18
Image Number: 137962
Caption: I've decided to change the way I Twitter-slam "Star Wars: The Force Awakens." Pointing out plot holes that aren't really plot holes is the latest trend online. I've been tweeting "It's the same story as the original" even though it's not. That was fun. But that critique is so last month. I still don't think "If Rey's the protagonist, why did Monopoly leave her out of the board game" is a "plot hole." And since when has Luke been old?
     
130. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-01-02 internet 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-01-02 Pub. Date: 2016-01-02
Image Number: 137203
Caption: I just edited your Wikipedia entry. Tap tap tap tap tap. Big whoop. What a coincidence, that's what scientists have classified you as: Bigwhoop … the much grumpier, much louder, and much much older second cousin of Bigfoot. YOU LOUSY SON OF A … Wait … thank you. That's very flattering.
     
131. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-12-22 internet 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-12-22 Pub. Date: 2015-12-22
Image Number: 136903
Caption: The hive mind has reached a consensus about 'Star Wars.' I don't want to hear it. An alpha doesn't care to hear the opinions of anonymous strangers on the internet. People are more likely to post ill-considered nonsense if their real names aren't attached to their words. Juiceman842 tweeted the opposite the other day. Proves my point.
     
132. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-12-21 internet 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-12-21 Pub. Date: 2015-12-21
Image Number: 136902
Caption: You never told me what you thought of 'Star Wars.' I was waiting. For what? For the consensus. My own immediate reaction to any piece of entertainment could be biased. I need to read tweets and posts before I settle on a verdict. If my view differs too much from the hive mind, it's not valid.
     
133. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-12-20 internet 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-12-20 Pub. Date: 2015-12-20
Image Number: 135998
Caption: That's the last time I even think of Googling "climate change."
     
134. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-12-08 internet 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-12-08 Pub. Date: 2015-12-08
Image Number: 136280
Caption: That time you realized your hashtags were longer than your message. #irony #wow #epiphany #wakeupCall #lesson #stopthat. Tap tap tap. #omg #thwarted #notgood #somethingsWrongHere #spiritualawakening #myword #ohlawdy #wthigoh #seriously? #wontSomebodyThinkofTheChildren? Error: You have exceeded the number of characters allowed. Delete delete delete. That time you. #irony #wow #epiphany #wakeupCall #lesson #stopthat #omg #thwarted #notgood #somethingsWrongHere #spiritualawakening #myword #ohlawdy #wthigoh #seriously? #wontSomebodyThinkofTheChildren?
     
135. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-11-18 internet 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-11-18 Pub. Date: 2015-11-18
Image Number: 135390
Caption: I've edited your Wikipedia entry again, Sadie. You're about to be inundated with phone calls from the press. Whatever, geek-boy. Tap tap tap tap tap. You're now the world's foremost authority on turkey leprosy, the disease that's threatening to ruin the holidays. No one'll believe that. Oh yeah? I wrote a Wikipedia page for turkey leprosy, too, along with examples of all the historical figures it's killed, such as the Archduke of Crushistan. There is no "Crushistan." I've written a Wikipedia entry for Crushistan. You should teach a class on wasting time. Ring ring ring ring.
     
136. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-11-10 internet 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-11-10 Pub. Date: 2015-11-10
Image Number: 135083
Caption: You want to see me, boss? I don't approve of the websites you've been visiting on company time. They're disgusting. Immoral. They sicken me to my core. If it were up to me, minion, they'd be illegal, and you'd be going to jail. If I want to visit the Bernie Sanders website, that's my business. You're on thin ice.
     
137. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-10-28 internet 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-10-28 Pub. Date: 2015-10-28
Image Number: 134465
Caption: How come you never take any of my ideas seriously? I'm a marketing genius. I have a long track record of attracting business in both the residential and commercial sectors. What? When? Where? I've generated hundreds of billions of simoleans in the last 24 years. Wait ... Are you taking about Sim City"? Everything I touch turns to solid gold!
     
138. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-10-24 internet 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-10-24 Pub. Date: 2015-10-24
Image Number: 134165
Caption: Did you hear Playboy's not going to show revealing photos anymore? What's Playboy? House of Java.net Cybercafe. Oh, right. Let me guess: You've never heard of it. Or maybe you have, but you've only read it for the articles. The only thing sadder than you telling those old jokes is if you really don't know ... Is it like Google?
     
139. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-10-15 internet 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-10-15 Pub. Date: 2015-10-15
Image Number: 133873
Caption: I've edited your Wikipedia entry again, Sadie. Tap tap tap tap tap. Whatever, dork-boy. You're no longer the world's first successfully-bred human-wildebeest hybrid. It turns out you had an undetected genetic mutation that led to extreme, continuous belching. I'm afraid you didn't make it. You and I are about to have a lot in common.
     
140. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-10-05 internet 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-10-05 Pub. Date: 2015-10-05
Image Number: 133534
Caption: I've lost faith in everything, Randy. I feel like a tiny raft drifting in a stormy sea. There is no up. There is no down. The entire foundation of the world is made of flimsy tissue paper. Maybe the Buddhists are right. Maybe nothing is really real at all. Facebook going down for a few hours last week isn't that big a deal, little buddy. Yes, it really is.
     
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