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Candorville

Comics and cartoons about christianity .

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Result page:    2  Next  (33 images)


1. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-12-08 christianity 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-12-08 Pub. Date: 2018-12-08
Image Number: 175267
Caption: I'd really like it if just once I could enjoy the holidays. On Christmas, when we celebrate the birth of Christ, I can't help but be angry that Emperor Augustus deported the Bethlehemians. On Easter, when people celebrate the resurrection, I can't help but mourn all the people Rome crucified. Bethlehemians? Don't even get me started on Kwanzaa.
     
2. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-01-04 christianity 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-01-04 Pub. Date: 2018-01-04
Image Number: 166782
Caption: I have chosen thee as my vessel, Clyde, through whom I will issue these New Commandments. This list was voted upon by a nationwide Survey-Baboon poll of white Evangelicals. Commandment Eleven: Bearing false witness is ok if it helpeth the faithful achieve their political goals. I'm gonna need to see some I.D., bruh. Commandment Twelve: The sins described in Commandments 1-10, if committed by a political ally, are fake news.
     
3. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-06-03 christianity 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-06-03 Pub. Date: 2017-06-03
Image Number: 158605
Caption: Heavenly father, should I preside over a gay wedding even if it means half my congregation will quit in protest? Should I lead my flock to the right side of history … Reverend of the Year 2000 … even if the sheep that put the most in the collection plate feel cozy on the wrong side? Give me a sign, heavenly father ... So you're saying I should ponder on this a few more years.
     
4. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-05-13 christianity 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-05-13 Pub. Date: 2016-05-13
Image Number: 143025
Caption: What's the last book you read, Clyde? The Bible. Really? You read the Bible? Of course. The Bible tell us no matter what awful, horrendous, calamitous thing we done, it already forgiven an' forgotten. What did you do? If JESUS don’t remember, why should I? (This cartoon was originally published on 2014-02-28).
     
5. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2015-05-09 christianity 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2015-05-09 Pub. Date: 2015-05-09
Image Number: 126510
Caption: Can you repeat that, Brother Braun? "Brown." Not "Braun," "Brown." You've got like 20 people in your congregation, how do you not know my name? Anyway, like I was saying, lately I've been feeling like nobody really knows me. Jesus know you, Leroy. Lemont. (This cartoon was originally published on 2013/04/20).
     
6. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2015-04-17 christianity 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2015-04-17 Pub. Date: 2015-04-17
Image Number: 125566
Caption: Heavenly Father, should I preside over a gay wedding even if it means half my congregation will quit in protest? Should I lead my flock to the right side of history … Reverend of the Year 2000 … Even if the sheep that put the most in the collection plate feel cozy on the wrong side? Give me a sign, Heavenly Father ... So you're saying I should ponder on this a few more years.
     
7. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2014-02-28 christianity 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2014-02-28 Pub. Date: 2014-02-28
Image Number: 107985
Caption: What's the last book you read, Clyde? The Bible. Really? You read the Bible? Of course. The Bible tell us no matter what awful, horrendous, calamitous thing we done, it already forgiven an' forgotten. What did you do? If JESUS don’t remember, why should I?
     
8. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2013-12-23 christianity 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2013-12-23 Pub. Date: 2013-12-23
Image Number: 105427
Caption: Merry Christmas, Tyrone. How dare you! Everyone knows Jesus wasn't born in December. Everyone knows the roman pagans celebrated SATURNALIA every December 17-23, and "Christmas" was the church's attempt to win those pagans over to Christianity by promising them they could still PARTY every December. You, sir, are engaged in a WAR ON SATURNALIA! I want to get a Christmas tree. That's just a ripoff of the SATURNALIA HEAD-ON-A-PIKE!
     
9. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2013-11-11 christianity 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2013-11-11 Pub. Date: 2013-11-11
Image Number: 103798
Caption: John 1:48-50 … Nathaniel said to him, "How do you know me?" Jesus answered him … "Before Philip called you, I saw you standing under a fig tree." Nathaniel said, "Rabbi, you are the son of God! You are the king of Israel!" Jesus replied: "Because I said I saw you standing under a fig tree ... ?" You're the only man I know who reads the bible for jokes. (This cartoon originally published on 11/4/2011).
     
10. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2013-09-03 christianity 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2013-09-03 Pub. Date: 2013-09-03
Image Number: 101088
Caption: Meanwhile, across town … "Donations are down because it's summer, and when people go on vacation … " … Their donations go with them." "I've been praying on it long and hard, Rollo. I didn’t even get dressed yesterday; spent all day in my prayer closet, in my Underoos. "Don't put that part in the letter. Just tell them tithing is good for the soul." ... Oh.
     
11. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2013-06-21 christianity 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2013-06-21 Pub. Date: 2013-06-21
Image Number: 98187
Caption: Whatchoo think of abortion, Big L? I think you're bringing up an emotional, divisive issue in order to distract me. Do you think Jesus woulda been against gay marriage 'cause he was black? Whatever, Clyde. I said I want that $2 you owe me. Did you know Jesus was an illegal immigrant? Thug 4 Life.
     
12. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2013-06-20 christianity 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2013-06-20 Pub. Date: 2013-06-20
Image Number: 98186
Caption: Did you know the Bible say charging interest is a sin? Thug 4 Life. So e'rebody that be charging me interest - bankers, payday loans, Massacard … They all gonna burn in the bottomless, fiery pit of damnation for all eternity. You've never even gone NEAR a church, Clyde. That's not important right now.
     
13. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2013-06-09 christianity 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2013-06-09 Pub. Date: 2013-06-09
Image Number: 97405
Caption: Rev, you know how you announced that we need $100k for renovations? Why do you ask, Marlin? Well … A congregant named Steven Warren put a $100,000 check in the donation plate. I don’t know if we should cash it: it seems like it must be a mistake. For one thing, the largest donation we ever made before was $50. "Looketh not a gift horse in the mouth." Not an official verse, but it should've been. Also, he mistakenly signed it "Mick E. Mouse. "Letteth not an unconventional nickname stop you from cashing a check." Not an official verse ...
     
14. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2013-04-20 christianity 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2013-04-20 Pub. Date: 2013-04-20
Image Number: 95775
Caption: Can you repeat that, Brother Braun? "Brown." Not "Braun," "Brown." You've got like 20 people in your congregation, how do you not know my name? Anyway, like I was saying, lately I've been feeling like nobody really knows me. Jesus knows you, Leroy. LEMONT.
     
15. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2012-10-26 christianity 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2012-10-26 Pub. Date: 2012-10-26
Image Number: 88839
Caption: What's your problem, Big L? Thug 4 Life. You said God spoke to you. He's NEVER spoken to me. And I've been going to church all my life! I'm like Kai Winn, the Vedek who never once heard from the prophets! What on Earth you talkin' about? … From Star Trek: Deep Space Nine. I think I might know why God don't be wantin' to talk to you. It's like I opened the Orb of Patheticness.
     
16. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2012-06-28 christianity 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2012-06-28 Pub. Date: 2012-06-28
Image Number: 82891
Caption: Reverend Wilfred W. Wilfred … yes? I am the Lord. I want you to retract your support for gay marriage, so that your congregation will come back, and you can once again afford to pay your electric bill and your employees. Are you sure you're God? Yes. You sound an awful lot like my secretary Jerome, speaking through a rolled-up newspaper. No, I don't think so ...
     
17. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2012-06-27 christianity 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2012-06-27 Pub. Date: 2012-06-27
Image Number: 82890
Caption: Heavenly Father, when I spoke out in favor of equal marriage rights for gays, half my congregation quit. If I don't change my mind, they won't come back. Reverend of the Year. 2000. If you think I should stay true to myself even if it means losing everything, give me some sign, heavenly Father ... So what you're saying is, it's really kind of a gray area?
     
18. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2012-06-26 christianity 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2012-06-26 Pub. Date: 2012-06-26
Image Number: 82889
Caption: Meanwhile, across town … "Dear congregant: When I spoke out in favor of equal marriage rights for gays last month … half of you quit the church. We want you back. If you renew your membership now, you'll receive a set of nunchucks and a gift certificate to Denny's." Perfect. "Call in the next fifteen minutes, and receive divine forgiveness at half off." No, that part just sounds desperate.
     
19. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2012-03-04 christianity 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2012-03-04 Pub. Date: 2012-03-04
Image Number: 76508
Caption: Reverend Wilfred, the Board of Trustees feels you're creating far too permissive an environment. There's a disturbing amount of hip-hop, short skirts and jacketless men in the congregation. The board's asked me, as deacon, to help you rein in the laxity and the temptation. I've brought a list of mandatory suggestions. Can you repeat that? When I was earning my doctorate in theology, I must've missed that class. What class are you referring to, reverend? "Alienating the youth and thereby condemning your church to a slow death, 101." You're only allotted one Kirk Franklin song a week.
     
20. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2011-12-24 christianity 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2011-12-24 Pub. Date: 2011-12-24
Image Number: 74338
Caption: Where did the kwithmath twee come fwum? Well that's an interesting story. It all started in A.D. 324 with Roman Emperor Justinian. Christian Romans worshiped Jesus, but pagan Romans worshiped the sun. Emperors Hadrian and Aurelian filled Rome with spectacular sun temples. There were annual festivals - incorporating a tree - celebrating the birth of the sun, which was said to be on December 25th. When Christianity supplanted paganism in Justinian's day ... ... it co-opted the pagan date of December 25, and the pagan use of the tree. Huh? The Christmas tree came from the forest. Oh.
     
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