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Candorville

Comics and cartoons about children's television .

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Result page:     (15 images)


1. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-06-23 children's television 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-06-23 Pub. Date: 2017-06-23
Image Number: 159392
Caption: This just in … Russia has persuaded its ally, the Dictator Santa Claus, to call for a ceasefire. In response, rebel elves have released their hostages and … Click … If passes, millions stand to lose their health insurance. Click … White supremacist activity is on the rise. A years-old report about how they were planning to infiltrate law enforcement is getting ... Click ... Won't you be my neighbor? It's Daniel Tiger's Neighborhood, a land of make-believe ...
     
2. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-04-30 children's television 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-04-30 Pub. Date: 2017-04-30
Image Number: 156792
Caption: What brings you to therapy … "Steve"? I feel like everything is slipping out of my clutches. Dr. Noodle. I spent years cozying up to the boss, isolating him from the advice of others, stoking his paranoia. I subtly convinced him that everyone was against him and that he could trust no one but me and his family, and even they were a little fishy. I had him in the palm of my hand. I said "buy," he bought. I said "sell," he sold. I said "destroy," and he ruined the lives of the people I said were his enemies. I was the most powerful man in the world! I was the man behind the throne! Did I say I charge $100 an hour? I meant to say $1,000. But then I made the mistake of turning off his tv in the middle of Finding Dory. It's his favorite movie.
     
3. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-04-27 children's television 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-04-27 Pub. Date: 2017-04-27
Image Number: 157287
Caption: Clyde, if something ever happens to me … Don’t worry, bruh. I'll take you kid an' raise him up for you. I'll teach him all he need to know about life. He'll be the baddest two-year-old on the block. Ain't nobody gonna mess with him. I'll also teach him erethang you woulda taught him: I'll make him watch Star Track an' Doctor Boo an' some @#$% like that. Long as he ain't a snitch, we'll be cool. I was just going to say "call Susan."
     
4. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-02-20 children's television 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-02-20 Pub. Date: 2017-02-20
Image Number: 154801
Caption: Well, you look down, Lemont. What's wrong? What could possibly be wrong? Today, the White House revoked my press credentials for asking one too many questions about their secret ties to Russia … and the Democratic party revoked my press credentials for asking one too many times why they're still using the same loser strategists ... and my baby boy revoked my dad credentials for turning off "Octonauts" one too many times. We all have bad days.
     
5. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-06-03 children's television 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-06-03 Pub. Date: 2016-06-03
Image Number: 143922
Caption: I wanna go home. But we just got here. You begged me to bring you here. You've been talking about it for days! I jutht wanna watch "Octonauts." Can I watch "Octonauts"? Can I? Can I watch "Octonauts"? When we get home and I turn on the tv, you'd better not cry and say "I wanna go outside." No pwomitheth.
     
6. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-03-24 children's television 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-03-24 Pub. Date: 2016-03-24
Image Number: 140811
Caption: Last night, I couldn't wait till my toddler went to sleep so I could relax and watch tv in peace. But once he fell asleep, I missed him so much that I watched his favorite shows till I fell asleep too. I could've watched "Game of Thrones" or a racy movie ... but I watched "Thomas the Train." ... for three hours, Susan. What's wrong with me? Reason #485 why I will never have kids. "Thomas the Train" is actually a pretty subversive show, when you think about it.
     
7. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2015-08-06 children's television 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2015-08-06 Pub. Date: 2015-08-06
Image Number: 130586
Caption: Whachoo wanna watch, Big L? Anything but Sesame Street. My don't crazy about it. Sometimes he says "watch Elmo" over and over again for hours until I finally give in and turn it on. If I hear "La la la la la … La la la la … Elmo's world" one more time, I just might throw the tv into the East River. Parent be trippin'. Elmo should be considered a class 2 drug.
     
8. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2015-01-24 children's television 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2015-01-24 Pub. Date: 2015-01-24
Image Number: 121836
Caption: Thanks for watching Lionel for me so I can work, Clyde. Yeh, he a cool little dude. I watched the whole Gilligan's Island marathon and Lionel didn't bother me once. He quiet. He don't make no mess. In fact it's almost like he wasn't here at all. That's 'cause I haven't dropped him off with you yet. Whatever. (This cartoon was originally published on 2013-01-09).
     
9. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2014-12-07 children's television 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2014-12-07 Pub. Date: 2014-12-07
Image Number: 119211
Caption: I'm rewatching J. Michael Straczynski's Babylon 5 for the fifth time, and something's bugging me. The show's all about right vs. wrong and good vs. evil. It's maybe the best morality play ever filmed for tv. Even the goofy comic relief character, Vir Cotto, ends up risking everything to rescue thousands of women and children from a holocaust. In that episode, he personally represents the morality of the entire show. Why, then, did J. Michael Straczynski end the episode with Vir joking that all marriages have problems after he found out his new wife was a raving bigot who had happily taken part in committing that genocide? If even J. Michael Straczynski would ruin his best story by going for a cheap laugh, it's not wonder everything coming out of Hollywood is dumbed down! Explain yourself, J. Michael Straczynski. Who are you and how did you get my phone number? That's not important right now.
     
10. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2014-02-21 children's television 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2014-02-21 Pub. Date: 2014-02-21
Image Number: 107710
Caption: What's wrong, Lemont? I decided to show my son the same cartoons I saw as a kid. So I YouTubed "Casper the Friendly Ghost." He liked it, but all I could think about was "Hey … that's a dead kid who's not allowed to go to heaven … "… He's condemned to roam the earth forever, trying in vain to make friends. And every time he fails, he tries to OFF himself." So those stories were fine for you but not for your kid? So then we watched the Smurfs, and I was like, "This is a caste system!"
     
11. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2013-01-09 children's television 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2013-01-09 Pub. Date: 2013-01-09
Image Number: 91985
Caption: Thanks for watching Lionel for me so I can work, Clyde. Yeh, he a cool little dude. I watched the whole Gilligan's Island marathon and Lionel didn't bother me once. He quiet. He don't make no mess. In fact, it's almost like he wasn't here at all. That's cause I haven't dropped him off with you yet. Whatever.
     
12. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2011-11-18 children's television 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2011-11-18 Pub. Date: 2011-11-18
Image Number: 72986
Caption: Lemont, I'm so happy for you that you won custody of Lionel. I know you're going to be an incredible father. I don't know that. I didn’t have a father growing up. I don’t know what being a dad means. I may totally screw him up for life. Tap t- What if I don’t know how to teach him to be confident, honorable, brave, ambitious and love Star Trek? What if I somehow make him a bloodthirsty, insecure slacker who's into reality TV? Tap tap tap. DELETE DELETE DELETE. Thanks. Tap t- ta- tap t- I'm so proud of you!
     
13. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2010-12-07 children's television 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2010-12-07 Pub. Date: 2010-12-07
Image Number: 55011
Caption: Facebook. Messages. From Sasha Mitchell. Hi Lemont. You probably don't remember me. I lived in Freeborn Hall at UC Berkeley back in 1994. I just saw you on TV, at some panel discussion. And I thought "what a coincidence!" Just the other day, I came across a picture of you I'd kept all these years, of you working as a door monitor at Freeborn. I remember watching you write ... Dear Sasha, OF COURSE I remember you! I've been pining away for you for 16 years. I love you with all my heart and soul, and I want to have your children. Delete delete delete. Dear Sasha, OF COURSE I remember you! Tap tap tap tap tap. Delete delete delete. Dear Sasha, You seem vaguely familiar. Tap tap tap tap tap.
     
14. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2008-09-23 children's television 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2008-09-23 Pub. Date: 2008-09-23
Image Number: 26923
Caption: John McCain's office. If you're calling to ask why we ran an ad saying Obama wanted to teach kindergarteners about sex… …when he really sought to protect them from sexual predators… Press "one". Boop. John McCain had to face much worse things than lies when he was a captive in a stinking rat hole in Vietnam! Oh, for the love of...
     
15. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2008-09-22 children's television 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2008-09-22 Pub. Date: 2008-09-22
Image Number: 26922
Caption: I'm about to tell you that Barack Obama wanted to teach "comprehensive sex education" to KINDERGARTENERS… …even though the legislation I'm referring to was really about teaching kids to protect themselves from predators. But I think winning an election is more important than protecting kids. I'm John McCain, and I approved this garbage. "Sir, we mistakenly aired the dry run" better be code for "everything's peachy," or someone's getting fired.
     
Result page:     (15 images)