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Rudy Park

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1. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2019-02-28 ago 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2019-02-28 Pub. Date: 2019-02-28
Image Number: 176512
Caption: Where's Rudy? He was here a second ago. We got into an argument. I was yelling at him about mixing up the hand soap and the body wash, and he excused himself. I have no idea where he is. Hiding under laurel's bed. In a relationship discussion. Need help. Breathe. Stay hidden. Coming.
     
2. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-12-31 ago 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-12-31 Pub. Date: 2018-12-31
Image Number: 175662
Caption: I finally understand. Understand what? Years ago, you were a star football player, a running back, if I'm not mistaken. So? All this stuff is coming about football and concussions. You probably suffered more than your share of brain trauma. Am I using too many big words, dough head? Gonna be a long week.
     
3. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-12-11 ago 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-12-11 Pub. Date: 2018-12-11
Image Number: 175398
Caption: You've modified your unified theory of picking up chicks? The first big change in 10 years. I had to account for a key change in how people relate. They have incredibly short attention spans. Under my old theory, you used to have 45 seconds to get a chick's attention. Now you have less than 20. You lost me two sentences ago. I'm tweeting. The Love Doctor rests his case.
     
4. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-10-03 ago 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-10-03 Pub. Date: 2018-10-03
Image Number: 174305
Caption: You got any biscuits? I like 'em with gravy. You smoke? Isn't that taboo? Mind your beeswax. Beeswax? Didn't that catchphrase go out years ago? I feel like Michael Douglas. Who? Actor. Can't go in public without being recognized. Can't live up to my rep, see. The herald's stuck in the past?!
     
5. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-08-15 ago 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-08-15 Pub. Date: 2018-08-15
Image Number: 173523
Caption: The Sadie Cohen Radio Hour presents: A True Confession. After days of denials, I can no longer keep the truth from my fans. There was a point several years ago where I showed kindness to rudy. I ask your forgiveness. Am I the only one having trouble following.
     
6. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-08-07 ago 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-08-07 Pub. Date: 2018-08-07
Image Number: 173395
Caption: I'm being blackmailed! What? By whom? It wasn't me. Don't hit. Not by you, you loser. Someone powerful. Someone who knows about my dark past. What dark past? Years ago, I was videotaped in a compromising position that involved … I can't say it. I won't say it. Say it. Never. Never, ever. Maybe for a foot massage.
     
7. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-08-03 ago 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-08-03 Pub. Date: 2018-08-03
Image Number: 173261
Caption: Ask Sadie. Dear Sadie, Most people mellow with age. So what's your problem? -Baldwood. *(Actual reader letter) Ask Sadie at rudy@rudypark.com. I'll handle this one. She has mellowed. You’re witnessing a watered-down Sadie Cohen. He's right. Five years ago, I'd have found the person who wrote this letter and beaten him silly with tree branches. Not a bad plan. Is there a return address? I stand corrected. (This cartoon was originally published on 2014-07-11)
     
8. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-06-12 ago 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-06-12 Pub. Date: 2018-06-12
Image Number: 172241
Caption: Meanwhile at a café in neighboring Canardville … Have you gathered all the regulars and local animals two-by-two, minion? You were serious about that, boss? Totally unrelated topic: Let's say thousands of years ago, a big oil company was bribing a local shopkeeper to let them use his basement. Let's call him ... oh, I don't know ... Noah. Let's say big oil was using Noah's Cafe to conduct an illegal fracking operation. Let's say this type of mining is ... a tad risky ... and let's say big oil assured Noah that his cafe would be the one place in town that wouldn't cave in. Very very bad man.
     
9. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-05-12 ago 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-05-12 Pub. Date: 2018-05-12
Image Number: 171300
Caption: What's your question for Ask Sadie? Who do you thin has the best fries? McDonald's or Arby's? That depends. Which one is still fried in cattle grease? I know one or the other of them caved in to the anti-clogged-arteryists and switched to vegetable oil years ago. Health-fetishists ruin everything! Health isn't bad. Health is like everything else, too much of it is unhealthy!
     
10. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-04-30 ago 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-04-30 Pub. Date: 2018-04-30
Image Number: 171058
Caption: Hey boss, mind if I give the 3-day-old muffins to Homeless Harry instead of throwing them out? Are you insane? Do you have any idea how many people are becoming homeless and moving into the alley every day? Three years ago it was just Homeless Harry. But now it's also Wandering Wanda, Displaced Daryl, Desolate Davina, Forlorn Farzad, Dispossessed Dale, Outcast Oswald, Derelect Daphne, Exiled Evan, Refugee Rachel, Itinerant Irving, and Vagabond Vernon. Tomorrow it could be Yomeless You, you know. Yomeless isn't a word, so that's not possible.
     
11. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-03-10 ago 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-03-10 Pub. Date: 2018-03-10
Image Number: 169200
Caption: Hey boss, it's almost the middle of March and I haven't been paid yet. Are you sure? Perhaps I already paid you for March back in February. Perhaps I've been paying you a whole month early for the last 16 years, and so you aren't actually entitled to another check until April. If you show me your very first check stub from 16 years ago, we could clear this up. Very. Mad. Man.
     
12. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-03-09 ago 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-03-09 Pub. Date: 2018-03-09
Image Number: 169199
Caption: Hey boss, it's almost the middle of March and I haven't been paid yet. Are you sure? Perhaps I already paid you for March back in February. Perhaps I've been paying you a whole month early for the last 16 years, and so you aren't actually entitled to another check until April. If you show me your very first check stub from 16 years ago, we could clear this up. Very. Mad. Man.
     
13. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-02-12 ago 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-02-12 Pub. Date: 2018-02-12
Image Number: 168441
Caption: Youtube just made it impossible for me to earn a living from my channel! How so? It used to be you needed 10,000 views of your videos, and then they'd start running ads on your channel. Now you need 4,000 hours of watch-time and 1,000 subscribers! It took me a year to get 10,000 views, and then the bottom drops out! I'm missing out on $400/year now, according to Social Blade. Have you ever heard something that you just know would've made zero sense if you'd heard it ten years ago? First Facebook changed the algorithms, now this!
     
14. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-12-26 ago 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-12-26 Pub. Date: 2017-12-26
Image Number: 166540
Caption: You wanted to talk to me, minion? It's about my tips, boss. Oh, that. Mr. Trump says it's not ok for me to keep all your tips. So I'm doing that. But you've been doing that for 17 years. You told me it was the law 17 years ago. What I did, Rudy, was proactively facilitate enterprise architecture to converge best practices with forward compatible, associate-focused revenue stream. Now get out there and energetically cultivate client-based tips to incubate synergistic incentivizational end-to-end paradigms. Make it stop!!!
     
15. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-12-01 ago 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-12-01 Pub. Date: 2017-12-01
Image Number: 165444
Caption: Says here the Mediterranean Sea wasn't always there. Big whoop, geek-boy. Tap tap tap tap tap. Says here 6 million years ago, it was a salty desert that was 10,000 feet below sea level … and because of the topography and the air pressure, it was a suffocating, hellish wasteland that got up to 170 degrees. Nothing but tardigrades, misery and extra-sweaty demons could've lived there. Which reminds me, didn't you say your family originally came from the Mediterranean? Which reminds me, when's the last time you brushed your teeth?
     
16. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-11-27 ago 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-11-27 Pub. Date: 2017-11-27
Image Number: 165440
Caption: Where've you been all weekend, Randy? Tibet. Women are coming out of the woodwork to exact justice on men who sexually harassed them years or decades ago. I wanted to know if I owe anyone an apology. So I climbed the tallest mountain and asked a monk to help me meditate, so I could retrieve crystal-clear memories of every time I ever flirted with a woman. Turns out the monk had to resign because he's sexually harassed someone. What the -- ... wait ... No, I'm actually not surprised anymore.
     
17. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-10-21 ago 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-10-21 Pub. Date: 2017-10-21
Image Number: 163920
Caption: We interrupt today's "The Price is Right" episode to bring you breaking news … Weeks ago, the Hubble telescope spotted a rogue planet the size of Venus plummeting through the solar system on a collision course with earth. It turns out it was actually just a prank involving two very bored ISS astronauts and a grapefruit. Breaking News!!!!! Maybe we should send them to Mars after all. One of them seems to have scrawled "Around and around and around and around" all over his space suit, in crayon.
     
18. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-09-10 ago 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-09-10 Pub. Date: 2017-09-10
Image Number: 161928
Caption: My uncle keeps sending me crazy, paranoid conspiracy theories he hears on Youtube. Dr. Noodle. It all started a few years ago when he sent me an email about how the victims of the Hindenburg crash were all crisis actors. These same victims died on the Titanic! He wrote. Then he told me President Obama was setting up Femur Camps, where he'd be letting the Illuminati harvest our femur bones for voodoo incantations to turn all our frogs into insomniacs. When I asked him why on earth would anyone want to do that? he said I had been brainwashed by the cabal that runs both the fake news and the pepperoni industries. So I replied why would they waste their time brainwashing me? What would they gain from that? Does your uncle have a hobby? Get him to refer uncle!!! $$$$$$$ ... because it's possible that you're his hobby. He said they've brainwashed me into thinking there's nothing to gain from brainwashing me.
     
19. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-09-04 ago 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-09-04 Pub. Date: 2017-09-04
Image Number: 162348
Caption: On today's Ask Sadie Show, I, Sadie Cohen, will discuss one topic: Hurricanes. We just suffered through the first "once-every-500-years" hurricane since the last "once-every-500-years" hurricane that happened just 12 years ago. My heart goes out to everyone who lost someone or something. And it also goes out to hurricanes like Harvey and Katrina, because this means war. Mother nature picked on the wrong species. Not sure who's worse: Donald Trump, Kim Jong Un, or Sadie Cohen. Wait ... she has a heart?
     
20. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-08-17 ago 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-08-17 Pub. Date: 2017-08-17
Image Number: 161546
Caption: A few years ago during a special episode of the Ask Sadie Show, our resident octogenarian* asked readers for advice about how she can deal with her midlife crisis. *(give or take a decade). Dear Sadie, You could try taking a trip to the Sahara Desert. Not only would it be an adventure, but you'd be the perfect person to catalog all the changes it's undergone. After all, you're probably the last person alive who remembers it when it was still a lush, ancient swamp. Happy Crisis, Anderson W. Stockton, CA. If you'd like, I could show you what it felt like when the tectonic plates collided. Advise Sadie at asksadieshow@gmail.com
     
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